If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
