Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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