Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
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Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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