Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Randomize
