hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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