Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She told me I should be a condom model.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
