if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
