And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
