should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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