Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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