awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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