He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize