i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize
