Texts From Last Night

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  (737): View more from Texas

  at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so

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  (737): at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...<div>(1-737): I hope so</div> http://tfl.nu/b6f6
  Replies (6) Good night (1368) Bad night (828)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl

  (313): View more from Michigan

  you mean his girlfriend

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  (312): he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl (313): you mean his girlfriend http://tfl.nu/d9fr
  Replies (3) Good night (588) Bad night (1083)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.

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  (775): My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication. http://tfl.nu/hfzx
  Replies (38) Good night (708) Bad night (2453)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.

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  (252): i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too. http://tfl.nu/myt5
  Replies (55) Good night (6071) Bad night (785)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.

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  (405): I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween. http://tfl.nu/pkl3
  Replies (20) Good night (5919) Bad night (610)
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  (845): View more from New York

  well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back

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  (845): well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back http://tfl.nu/xxu5
  Replies (33) Good night (4243) Bad night (1382)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.

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  (973): composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals. http://tfl.nu/kw2o
  Replies (13) Good night (5282) Bad night (911)
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  (575): View more from New Mexico

  You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.

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  (575): You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup. http://tfl.nu/dggj
  Replies (4) Good night (4381) Bad night (1014)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.

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  (440): I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire. http://tfl.nu/vw34
  Replies (11) Good night (3115) Bad night (754)
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  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair

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  (+31): Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair http://tfl.nu/outv
  Replies (3) Good night (540) Bad night (1027)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?

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  (814): how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus? http://tfl.nu/r0fm
  Replies (3) Good night (691) Bad night (295)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.

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  (407): I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history. http://tfl.nu/a6pc
  Replies (6) Good night (798) Bad night (347)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.

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  (636): You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone. http://tfl.nu/14uf
  Replies (7) Good night (461) Bad night (288)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.

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  (603): I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty. http://tfl.nu/jo6d
  Replies (5) Good night (316) Bad night (685)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"

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  (616): I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower" http://tfl.nu/rsrj
  Replies (2) Good night (392) Bad night (209)

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