Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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