BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
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