We're facebook friends in real life
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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