ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
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