; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
is wine microwaveable?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
