The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
he was CRYING into my vagina
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
