Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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