I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize