I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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