I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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