I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize