I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
How's work?
Spinning.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
