Whod you bang
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
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