It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
