I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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