Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
