If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize
