Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
