My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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