Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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