This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
