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I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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