the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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