I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
