Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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