apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
He felt like a one man threesome
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Sext me about skeletons
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
