HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I want to fling myself into the sun
we should paint friendship bongs
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
