bring money and cleavage
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
