Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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