I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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