He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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