Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
