Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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