sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
