she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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