I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
